| | I figured I should elaborate on what I was talking about at I-631 for those of you that were there...this is the convo I was talking about:
Josh: i just pray for alot
Josh: I have prayed for an hour before and i didnt even know it
Me: I used to. but I don't know...I guess I thought it wasn't worth it. that there was no point for a while. but every day, I see things happen and I know that it is worth it, ya know? There's no way that it's not
Josh: yeah , I have learned about life the hard way
Josh: and i think that is the way He wants me to learn
Me: yeah.
Josh: it may be to prepare me for something bigger in the future
Josh: but that is just what I think
Me: yeah I don't know. I let things get to me for a while..and I literally just realized how much I don't deserve things that I have. AH ...I don't know...I messed up. I know that now
Josh:we all mess up
Josh: that is something we cannot get around
That conversation made me think about things I have been going through recently. I keep seeing more and more everyday that there's a reason that I'm with Josh (not technically of course as he is currently in Iraq). But he makes me see so many things that I had never seen before and I think that God did that on purpose..I know you're amazed.
I don't pray anymore. not in a long time. Not until I met Josh and he went back to Iraq. I just thought it wasn't worth it. I didn't see the repercussions at the time. But I see now that the reason he's in my life is because I was straying so far away from God. I had just been so torn in the past year probably about what to believe. I thought about things until they just seemed stupid. I went on logic instead of faith. I know better than that. But It's something that everyone goes through I think. As you further your education, you learn more things that could make you question. you just have to figure out what you want out of all of it and stick with it I guess  |
| | Posted 9/21/2005 10:55 PM - 2 Views - 3 eProps - 3 comments
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